LOVE SEEKER

最近  忙到天昏地暗

早已分不清什么是工作、什么是私人生活

没有停下来驻足的时间

没有停下来思考的时间

……

深呼吸

我  决定要改变

……

明天开始

我要聪明地工作

我要充实的生活

 

为了爱我的人

也为了我爱的人

I was reading the story of how Adam and Eve ate the fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and thus became sinners. There was one line that caught my eye, which says that God gave every tree in the garden pleasant to the sight and good for food for Adam and Eve, only commanding them not to eat the fruits from only 2 trees - the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

 

They had an abundance of good choices, and yet impossibly picked the worst one.

They did not lack anything, and yet chose to get what they were not supposed to get.

 

There is of no coincidence that I read this story again at this time of the year. I am reminded of what I've already been given and warned of my curiosity and sinful desires. Ha, I've got "every tree pleasant to the sight and good for food", why on earth am I asking for what I'm not suppose to get? I always wanted SOMETHING MORE/ELSE, subconsciously insisting that SOMETHING is gonna be better than what I have. But is it always true? Now I doubt.

 

“为了自己的梦想，我愿意牺牲什么、牺牲多少、牺牲多久？”

最近一直在思考这些问题……

 

曾向上帝祷告，

希望祂能为我打开一扇门。

可现在

不只一扇门开了

怎么才能知道哪扇才是祂开的门呢？

 

惟有继续祷告

直至答案揭晓。

 

------------ 待续 ------------------

 

好几天没有上网。今晚终于回到家，上网看了看新闻，发现美国把堕胎合法化了……我不想把宗教政治化，也不想把政治宗教化。在此只发表一些个人的看法。

我一直都反对堕胎。试问我们有什么能力决定一个无辜生命的生死？当胎儿在母体中存在时，我相信那对于母亲来说是一种荣耀。作为女人，如果你不想怀孕，就应该做好“预防措施”。一句“那是一个意外”“我没有能力抚养”并不能成为一个理由。每个人都应该对自己的行为负责，不是吗？如果我们犯了一个关乎人命的错误，我们可以亲手消灭证据再补上一句“其实我那时很傻很天真”而期望得到谅解吗？

也许赞成堕胎的人会争辩，说如果父母没有抚养能力就把婴孩生下，不是会造成更大的社会问题吗？可是，我们怎么能因为避免那未来可能产生的问题，而选择今天的逃避呢？难道把堕胎合理化后，就不会出现更多没有责任心的人，为了自己身体上的愉悦感或其他原因，一次又一次地扼杀生命吗？丧失了良心的人比谁都可怕！

我是一个基督徒，所以我相信每一个生命都是上帝赐予的，我们没有权力去选择接受与拒绝。欣然地接受，用心地去爱才是我们应该做的。中国不是有句俗话“天无绝人之路”吗？我相信如果上帝赐予我们一个生命，它也会在同时为那生命准备一条生路。如果我们大多数人都学会为自己负责，那我相信我们也会有多余的精力去帮助那些不能为他们行为负责的人。泯灭良心地去扼杀生命绝对不是正确的选择。

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“每一次堕胎，都意味着双重的死亡，也就是，既杀死一个婴孩，也杀死了自己的良心。”（摘自《德兰修女传》）

今天终于把《德兰修女传》看完了。其中有一个情节的描述让我久久难忘。话说有一人质问德兰修女，为什么要把如此多的资源与精力耗费在处于社会最底层的垂死的人身上。有很多问题都是社会制度的不完善所导致的，为什么德兰修女从不去解决问题的根源。

 

相信很多做过义工的人都曾经问过自己这样的问题：如果社会制度不能更完善，如果人们的偏见不改善，无论自己多么努力，问题仍然存在。不幸的人、穷苦的人只会一直增多。那样的付出还有意义吗？

 

以前，我的答案会是：我相信当量的积累达到一定的程度，必然会引起质变。只要我们每个人付出一点，哪怕只是自己的绵薄之力，问题就一定会有所改善。

 

而德兰修女的回答是：每个人都有活着的尊严与权利，都应被爱。每个生命在上帝的眼中都是平等的，因此我们不能因为那些穷人将死，就剥夺了他们生存与被爱的权利。每一次爱的付出也许就能改变那个穷人的一生。社会制度的变革可以由社会家、政治家们去讨论与制定。可是，如果我（指德兰修女本人）不去照顾穷人，就没有人照顾他们了。上帝总会根据它赐予我们的才能，召唤我们在不同的领域“发光发热”。可是，“去爱人”这一点是永不改变的。

 

－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－

 

不想写下去了，open question本来就应该给人留下思考的空间……

 

个人的感受？……突然想起了某人的一句话“Are you genuinely interested in people? I think you are too task-oriented lately."　（会懂的人自然就会懂）

 

My heart is overflowing with joy.

No reason, and no particular reason is needed.

 

Looking back and seeing how much I've been blessed, how can I stop praising Him?

His purposes are revealing gradually, and plans are laid in my heart.

 

------- To-do List for Feb. - Jun.------------------

1. Get a job that I'm interested in and work hard

   (aiming to practise my E.M. skills)

2. Self-study accounting/finance

   (aiming to have a general understanding of the concepts)

3. Contionue volunteering

   (perhaps in orphanage)

4. Get my driving licence

   (aiming to buy myself a car by the end of the year)

5. Finish reading half of the bible

   (aiming to finish reading it within a year)

6. Find a local church and settle down

   (it's the hardest among all, tbh)

--------------------------------------------------

 

 "Trista, you can do it!" (haha)

 

 

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age.

 

Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our healthcare is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

 

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable, but no less profound, is a sapping of confidence across our land; a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real, they are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this America: They will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn-out dogmas that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of shortcuts or settling for less.

It has not been the path for the faint-hearted, for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame.

Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things -- some celebrated, but more often men and women obscure in their labor -- who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life. For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West, endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died in places Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions -- that time has surely passed.

Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done.

The state of our economy calls for action: bold and swift. And we will act not only to create new jobs but to lay a new foundation for growth.

We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together.

We will restore science to its rightful place and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its costs.

We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age.

All this we can do. All this we will do.

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions, who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short, for they have forgotten what this country has already done, what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them, that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long, no longer apply.

MR. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works, whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified.

Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end.

And those of us who manage the public's knowledge will be held to account, to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day, because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched.

But this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control. The nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous.

The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on the ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart -- not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.

Our founding fathers faced with perils that we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations.

Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake.

And so, to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and we are ready to lead once more.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with the sturdy alliances and enduring convictions.

They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use. Our security emanates from the justness of our cause; the force of our example; the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy, guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort, even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We'll begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people and forge a hard- earned peace in Afghanistan.

With old friends and former foes, we'll work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat and roll back the specter of a warming planet.

We will not apologize for our way of life nor will we waver in its defense.

And for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that, "Our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken. You cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you."

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness.

We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus, and nonbelievers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth.

And because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect.

To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict or blame their society's ills on the West, know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy.

To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history, but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds.

And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to the suffering outside our borders, nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages.

We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service: a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves.

And yet, at this moment, a moment that will define a generation, it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies.

It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break; the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours.

It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new, the instruments with which we meet them may be new, but those values upon which our success depends, honesty and hard work, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism -- these things are old.

These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history.

What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility -- a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence: the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed, why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall. And why a man whose father less than 60 years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day in remembrance of who we are and how far we have traveled.

In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by nine campfires on the shores of an icy river.

The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood.

At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive, that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet it."

America, in the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words; with hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come; let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

Thank you. God bless you.

And God bless the United States of America.

-----------------------------------------------------

 

Although I'm not an American, I am deeply touched and encouraged by his speech. I like him, not only because he's charming, but also because I can sense that God is with him. Without God, he won't be able to come this far, I believe. The first African-American president in the U.S. is definitely another miracle of God.

 

 

Spent a weekend in a hotel which my dad built 2 years ago~ Relaxed

 

Photos taken from the balcony:

 

 

 

 

Toilet is very important~.~

 

----------Holiday's Over------------------------------

 

Belated Happy New Year 2009 to you all, especially to whom I haven't had the chance to say so!

 

As the 1st blog entry of the year, it's supposed to be my new year resolution. However, I'd like to make an exception. Following is something I read earlier today. It inspired me a lot, and I hope that it'll do the same to you. Enjoy reading~

 

 

Infusing Service into Our Work, or the Case of the Singing Orderly

不小心打翻了装满回忆的玻璃瓶

在记忆的碎片中找到了你

“Never compromise for the second best."

笨笨的我还是没有学会……